when a catatonic woman is admitted to the psych unit, Thea, a social worker, feels an instant jolt of recognition. turns out she’s connected to something Thea thought she’d buried for good. and just as quickly as the woman appears… she vanishes. no answers and no goodbye.

the trail leads Thea to a strange and secluded retreat in the New Mexico desert run by an unsettlingly magnetic couple. to get the truth Thea has to play along - joining in on bizarre and boundary-pushing “healing” exercises that feel more like mind games. the deeper she goes the more she starts to question everything including her memories and her sanity and whether she’s about to become the next one to disappear.

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after bartz’s first book (the writing retreat) i couldn’t wait to dive in to this one. it was everything i wanted and more.

the characters were captivating and infuriating. the story was mesmerizing and though bizarre and shocking… it was also realistic. as someone who lives in LA and has been lightly exposed to cults/cult-like behavior especially in the spiritual community… i was pretty impressed with how julia captured the essence of subtle and escalating manipulation among these types of groups. watching the subtleties develop into extremes was beautifully and delicately done.

color me enthralled.

and consumed.

couldn’t put this down. couldn’t stop thinking about catherine and how trauma and patterns will dictate your life if you let them. i had moments of hating thea and moments of loving her - she was definitely a challenging character for me to digest.

for those who may find this story/plot unrealistic or too over the top... it may simply reflect experiences that are outside their personal frame of reference as i would have felt the same prior to my own experiences.

also recommended for those who watched love has won: the cult of mother god or escaping twin flames

(4.5/5 stars)